Attention: Aspiring Ladies

In perhaps one of the most hilarious performances of one of the silliest songs of all time, this goofball manages to say some stuff that isn't really okay. Like why does he get to decide that a certain "kind" of woman that he'd "like to flaunt and take to dinner" is a lady. Like because he wants to dress her up and take her out and sleep with her, that somehow makes her dignified. Oh, and don't forget this gem: "she always knows her place." Harumph. And then commences the talk-about-her-like-she's-a show-pony part: "she's got style, she's got grace, she's a winner." And that's just the first verse!

The rest of the lyrics plus a rare performance of the song are posted below (emphasis has been added by me). Please laugh at Tom Jones. At least he looks like a jackass, because for all eternity, people will remember him in those pants.

Well, she's never in the way
Always something nice to say, and what a blessin'
I can leave her on her own
Knowin' she's OK alone and there's no messin'

She's a lady
Oh, whoa, whoa, she's a lady
Talkin' about that little lady
And the lady is mine

Well, she never asks very much
And I don't refuse her

Always treat her with respect [really? is that why you feel okay leaving her alone this time?]
I never would abuse her
What she's got is hard to find
And I don't want to lose her
Help me build a mountain
From a little pile of clay, hey hey hey

Well, she knows what I'm about
She can take what I dish out, and that's not easy [cause it's all about you, dude]

But she knows me through and through
And she knows just what to do and how to please me
She's a lady
Oh, whoa, whoa, she's a lady
Talkin' about that little lady
And the lady is mine
Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's a lady
Oh, whoa, whoa, she's a lady
Talkin' about that little lady
And the lady is mine

Author: Cherchez La Femme

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