Missed Connections: Hot Dog! We Have a Wiener!

The Missed Connections forum on Craigslist is a wasteland of terrible poetry, dick pics, and whining, but among the detritus are some truly fascinating, funny, and occasionally sweet entries. The following are highlights from the Western Mass Missed Connections forum, sans detritus.

Hot Dogs — m4m (Lenoxdale) 

We had hotdogs at the same time today (Saturday). I’ve seen you around town. You’re very handsome. Long-shot I know, but if you’re into guys, let me know! Aug. 26, 2017 

Hunk at Dotties on Sunday — w4m (Dotties)

You’re a tall man, shaved head, gorgeous eyes, wearing a white tshirt and black athletic shorts. Im a tall woman wearing a floral jacket and jean shorts. Made eyes and said hi as you walked in. Had to leave but wanted to get your number. Wanna get a coffe with me? Keep thinking of your smile Aug. 29, 2017

Attn: S. C. — w4m (North Adams)

Hell Idk if people even read these, but figured it was worth a shot. I see you all over town, we seem continually to be like ships in the night quickly passing one another, but our five minute conversations always brighten my day. You’re super friendly and complimenting, and obviously JUST as nerdy as me, not to mention positively beautiful, I think we’d make great friends if ever we had time to hang. If you DO read this, send a reply. I’d love to chat. Aug. 29, 2017

Springfield FP — m4m (Springfield)

We talked for a while in the park, You said “it was so nice to have met you” I had exercise clothing on You had jeans on and you were walking 2 large dogs I expected to see you on the way back from my jog but you were gone. You must live in walking distance, you appeared not to have a car Aug. 28, 2017

Black lace goth/punk outfit arms full of bags — m4w (Amherst)

I drove by, I beeped, like an ass. I’m not sure. It’s just, you don’t see a lady with the punk goth look much. You looked back, tell me what I drove or what street you were on if you’d like to grab coffee and chat Aug. 28, 2017

Cummington Fair — w4m

Cummington Police Officer working at the fair Saturday night. You said good night to me as I was leaving but I couldn’t talk because I was staring into your gorgeous eyes. You probably won’t see this, but if you do, hit me up. Aug. 28, 2017

Got wood? — m4w (Wstfld)

You took my order and while I waited at the drive up, you asked me “is that wood”? It kinda threw me for a second until I realized you could smell the fresh lumber I had. You said you love that. I think that’s hot when a woman shares that kinda stuff so casually. Hey if you want to come work with me sometime, HMU. We could go lumber shopping then go build. It would be awesome. Tell me about your piercings, color and placement and where you work. Aug. 28, 2017

Sunoco on e. Columbus ave. — w4m (Springfield)

To the gentleman who hit on me at the gas station thank you. I was having a rough morning and just a small comment that I’m beautiful made my day so much better. It helps that you’re attractive as well, was hoping to catch dinner some time but you left before you got my number. If you see thing, long shot that you will, message me back an tell me what I looked like. If you’re on okhookup tell me the name you go by. Aug. 28, 2017

Did you order a hot dog with no bun from the Rendezvous? — m4w (Turners Falls)

Hi, I don’t think I know you but I was told we should meet. I’m not local, but I am only about a six and a half hour drive away. You want to meet at the IKEA in New Haven and get dinner some time? Aug. 27, 2017

Gaggle of girls in Mulinos — w4w (Northampton)

But maybe makeup girl didn’t talk to anyone at the wedding because she was surrounded by a hoard of bitchy women. Be careful who you talk about when you are in a crowd of people you think you don’t know. Aug. 27, 2017

Ignorance and hate

How are you guys? You actually may be a really good couple. I’m sorry I made any waves in your perfectly evil tribalism. Ask yourselves why you are affected by an outsider if your bond is so strong? Two against one isn’t exactly fair, but if the one has more pureness of heart, what you call on a high horse, and enough rationale to leave a toxic situation, are they really the loser? A locked mind is not superior. A misinformed heart is no better. She got you. Better watch out. I was you once. Aug. 27, 2017

Jury duty Locking eyes in the rear couch area in Springfield — m4w (Sprinfield)

Hello I am posting here because I’m not sure where else to try and find you. We were both in Jury duty and sitting in the rear of the room near the vending machines. You were a very beautiful PR woman I believe and we locked eyes a couple times and smiled. You were called into the court room and gone. Would love to connect again with you. Aug. 24, 2017

Kristin Palpini

Author: Kristin Palpini

Editor of the Valley Advocate

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