As I ponder my resistance to Robert Jensen, and now anti-macho spokesperson Jackson Katz (whom I’ll discuss at greater length next week), I come to yet another conclusion. Crusaders, be they political, moral, or religious, nearly always have zero charm or senses of humor, and no interest in cultivating either. And it’s that humorlessness, that refusal to catch flies with honey, that, without exaggeration, infuriates me, as their sourpussness necessarily relegates their very important messages to the category of preaching to the converted (or helps them to lose presidential elections – see Al Gore, Michael Dukakis, John Kerry, et al, as opposed to charmers Bill Clinton, Ronald Reagan, etc.) Jensen wants to change the way men think and act, claims to want to speak to all men, but his text speaks only to men and women with decidedly feminist tendencies from the git go. While I realize that the charm of a Clinton or a Reagan is not something just anyone can cultivate, it’s the refusal of supposed spokespeople to even try to win over their audience that gets me.
Jackson Katz has similar aims and similar failings, focusing on destroying the machismo that leads to male violence inflicted on women. As you watch the video above, ask yourself how many boys, young men, older men, who aren’t already inclined to his view, are going to anything but tune-out or mock him.
I recently watched my friend Eugene Mirman‘s first Comedy Central half-hour special, and I was especially proud of and impressed by how he very subtly, very funnily, sneaks educational social commentary into the work that he puts out to the 18-35 year old men and women of America. (note: the top left corner pic refers to the heinous Westborough Baptist Church’s "God hates Fags" site and movement. I’ve always wanted to make a bumper sticker that confuses and pisses off everyone – "Kill God Not Babies" – but it looks as if Eugene has, more or less, beaten me to the punch.). Here is but one example that speaks to Katz, Jensen et al. Eugene worries that the joke loses something in translation to text, but I think it still works quite well:
I was talking to a girl who said it was okay for her to use the word ‘fag’ because her brother is gay. That’s a terrible excuse, just because you know someone. However, the reason it’s okay for me to say ‘fag,’ is because I’m full of hate. And it’s just an expression of that hatred.
What this world needs to battle "that hatred" is more Eugene Mirmans (Eugene Mirmen?) or at least more people addressing these issues who don’t feel they’re above having to, frankly, at least now and then, entertain their audience. I really feel that a good part of the reason that more enlightened, activist celebrity men, the Tim Robbinses, the George Clooneys, don’t take up the torch for battling entrenched sexism and machismo is that all the men and women who make this issue in particular their full-time jobs are pedantic jerks.
No, sexism is no joke, and rape and domestic abuse are even less so, but a little charm, a little humor, go a long, long way, and, dear world, I think I can safely speak for Dan when I say that we would/will be glad to go and charm the pants off America in the name of more enlightened manhood.
I guess this should be the part where I stick a Paypal button on the site and ask you to pay for us to buy a van and tour the country this summer preaching the word, but, for now, I’d settle for a book contract and five minutes on The Colbert Report.
Come to think of it, though, this post wasn’t such a gut-buster either. Stay tuned – big yucks next week!!!
