Under irony would be this true fact: I’ve spent weeks (months) sorting through stuff—think, small plastic objects, think, toys and more toys, think, paper clips, papers, the undone, the unsent, the what do I do with—only to make it easier for two big houseful events: craft show, Christmas brunch. Might one acquire stuff at these two events? Indeed.
As Jews who practice a very informal (read, minimal) at-home Judaism, Christmas is, as far as I can tell—about stuff and gathering people together. Not in equal parts, but the stuff—even successfully bringing the stuff factor down a bunch of notches—is a real factor. Parts of that are fun: as I wrote earlier, I really love putting together an annual calendar and I hope—trust even—getting the calendar is really nice for those peeps who get ‘em, and finding or making or doing things for folks we love, that’s delightful. If you read this blog, you probably have me pegged as a giving sort. So, framing a favorite picture of Saskia and her pal-cousin-in-spirit Arella for A’s parents, that’s a delight, as is making them a babysitting offer.
Remy—filled with anticipation and industry—made a great sign for Ezekiel, which I had laminated: one side read Don’t Move This Food and the other side read Wake Me Up, which are Ezekiel’s commonest refrains in the evening. He made a magnet sign for Lucien that read The Chef is In and an alphabet magnet for Saskia. I received a gorgeous box he’d painted in school and Hosie got a book Remy made at Hilltown Charter’s most delightful Winter Fair.
Remy also got horribly disappointed about Christmas.
The papa and the aunt were sick on Christmas Eve—ahem, I am SuperMom because I did my “share” and then decorated the tree and wrapped nearly everything and got the house ready for the 14 to brunch without my spouse’s help, so yeah, tip of the hat to me—and because we weren’t sure whether they’d possibly be ambulatory on Saturday, we pushed off some extended family gift giving. Oh, and he got a pogo stick (cool, huh?) but he “doesn’t like to jump.” Who knew? I had things cleaner and calmer—and Remy’s still hoping for things he asked for. Ahem, take that SuperMom status and pull it down some pegs. “Why?” Remy asked me, “Do you let other people get me my favorite things?” Favorite things in this case being the Devil Sticks I purchased on behalf of an aunt and a grandmother. Well, why indeed? Maybe next year, I’ll let them give books and socks.
Mini-aside: the Devil Sticks were the best gift. Period. He’s been learning how to use them at school—and he’s surprisingly accomplished. I mean, a little wow, plus lots of fun.
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Last year, Remy was disappointed because all the gifts were so yesterday. In the interim between my figuring the holiday gifts out and the holidays he’d decided that he no longer liked toys. So.
What’s true about Remy is that he’s of the prepare-and-anticipate school more than the always-love-the-event school. He’s a critic. He’s easily over-stimulated. He really does often end a day telling me, “That (fill in the blank) wasn’t so much fun.” You can fill in the blank with stuff like birthday party, school trip, outing, playdate and you can assume at least fifty percent of the time that he looked like he was having fun in the doing.
I feel terribly each and every time he is disappointed, even though I’ve learned to empathize, contextualize and move on.
We’re supposed to get snow, bunches of it, and he’s really excited. You now know what he’s likely to say after it falls. Regardless.
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With so many people—the six of us, the rest of the family, the friends—there are inevitably some ups and some downs on any given day. Truthfully, we had a lovely and relaxed time, brunching and hanging out (and we barely saw Saskia and Arella, because they were busy in their fairy wings having adventures; Arella even wore hers home, over her coat). That’s really the best, most important part, all that hanging out (my endless house improvement project will continue, today, while it storms).
What might the kids do if we are somewhat snowed in? I got them a gingerbread house kit, cookie pieces already baked, so the assembly and decorating part is all that’s left. Still on the table: make gingerbread people from scratch this week, but I wanted to get to the fun part without the fuss for a project I’d never have committed to another way—and if it goes well, I’ll feel wholly Supermom-mish.
