Free Will Astrology: Unleash your bravado without getting yourself kidnapped, Leo
Aug31

Free Will Astrology: Unleash your bravado without getting yourself kidnapped, Leo

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland,” our heroine encounters a talking caterpillar as he smokes a hookah on top of a tall mushroom. “Who are you?” he asks her. Alice is honest: “I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then.” She says this with uneasiness. In the last few hours, she has twice been shrunken down to a...

Read More
Free Will Astrology: Don’t settle for too little, Taurus
Aug21

Free Will Astrology: Don’t settle for too little, Taurus

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “The prettier the garden, the dirtier the hands of the gardener,” writes aphorist B. E. Barnes. That’ll be especially applicable to you in the coming weeks. You’ll have extra potential to create and foster beauty, and any beauty you produce will generate practical benefits for you and those you care about. But for best results, you’ll have to expend more effort than maybe you...

Read More
Free Will Astrology: You’re wrestling the wrong foe, Pisces
Jul29

Free Will Astrology: You’re wrestling the wrong foe, Pisces

ARIES (March 21-April 19): I predict that August will be a Golden Age for you. That’s mostly very good. Golden opportunities will arise, and you’ll come into possession of lead that can be transmuted into gold. But it’s also important to be prudent about your dealings with gold. Consider the fable of the golden goose. The bird’s owner grew impatient because it laid only one gold egg per day; he foolishly slaughtered his prize animal...

Read More
Free Will Astrology: Libra, your new nickname is Delicadeza
Jul23

Free Will Astrology: Libra, your new nickname is Delicadeza

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Be extra polite and deferential. Cultivate an exaggerated respect for the status quo. Spend an inordinate amount of time watching dumb TV shows while eating junk food. Make sure you’re exposed to as little natural light and fresh air as possible. JUST KIDDING! I lied! Ignore everything I just said! Here’s my real advice: Dare yourself to feel strong positive emotions. Tell secrets to animals and...

Read More
Free Will Astrology: Advice from Kafka, Kahlo, and bodybuilder Kai Greene
Jul16

Free Will Astrology: Advice from Kafka, Kahlo, and bodybuilder Kai Greene

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic.” Whenever that quote appears on the Internet, it’s falsely attributed to painter Frida Kahlo. In fact, it was originally composed by poet Marty McConnell. In any case, I’ll recommend that you heed it in the coming weeks. You really do need to focus on associating with allies who see the mysterious and lyrical best in you. I will also suggest that you...

Read More