Hi Yana,
I recently attended one of your workshops about the G-spot and it worked! My partner and I went home that night and I squirted. But it’s so strange because when I squirt it doesn’t happen as I climax. It isn’t like a climactic orgasm. It just feels crazy good and then I squirt. We were wondering if we could time it so that I could have the clitoral climax at the same time that I squirt?
— Star Squirting Student
Dear SSS,
Holy Star Student status! Plenty of folks report success with their newly learned sexpertise from my workshops, but OMG-spot, rarely do people go straight home and start squirting all over the place the very same night. As I say in my workshops, I can spend hours giving you information, but it’s up to you to have the bravery to utilize and communicate that information to your partners — so good on you.
I’m so glad you bring this up as in my G-spot workshops, I aim to address many myths barring us from great G-spot explorations and pleasures including:
That it doesn’t exist. (Hi, it does — I don’t just go around teaching workshops about unicorns);
That female ejaculation is pee. (I’m a grown woman, I think I know the difference between peeing my bed and having an orgasm);
And finally, that a G-spot orgasm is the orgasm of all orgasms.
You are living, breathing, squirting proof, SSS, that this simply isn’t true for everyone. While a G-spot orgasm feels more like an internal, pleasurable release, a clitoral orgasm can often feel more surface, intense and, well, climactic.
If we look at where these two pleasurable spots are located and how they’re stimulated, this makes a lot of sense. The G-spot (which, is less like a spot and more like an area) is located about one-to-two knuckles deep inside the vaginal canal, on the upper wall. It’s easiest reached with curved fingers or a curved toy.
The clitoris, however, is located on the outside of the body, near the top of the vulva where the folds of the labia meet, where it chills with its little hood on until aroused enough to quite literally get a little boner, making itself more accessible and visible.
G-spot climax is often reached via penetration. For most people, deep penetration at first which then changes to shallow penetration closer to G-spot climax. Some people ejaculate (aka, squirt) from this stimulation and some report a climax without the fluids.
Clitoral climax is reached by direct, consistent stimulation, usually via fingertips or a vibrator, and typically 20-30 minutes of it.
So, SSS, you ask, “Can I sync these two climaxes?!” Well, this varies person-to-person. For many, squirting requires relaxing the vaginal muscles to allow the fluid to come out while a clitoral orgasm may contradictorily require some muscle flexing, strong pelvic contractions or toe-pointing. It’s a bit like patting your head while rubbing your stomach — it can be hard to synchronize these two movements, but it can probably be done with practice.
If I were you, I would outfit myself with the best G-spot-hitters around: the NJoy Pure Wand for my G-spot and the wireless, rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand for my clitoris.
Alternate stimulation between your clitoris and your G-spot until you feel like both spots are close to climax — this will probably require a lot of “edging,” getting close to and backing away from orgasm. Then, bring on the Pure Wand/Magic Wand combo pack.
Pro tip: Depending on your body, your G-spot may swell with fluid to the point of being very close to the outside of your vaginal opening, in which case just using the wide coverage of the head of the Hitachi Magic Wand to stimulate both your clitoris and your vaginal opening may do the trick.
Would love to hear how it goes!
Yana Tallon-Hicks is a pleasure-positive sex writer and educator living in the Pioneer Valley. She has a website bursting with sex advice, workshops, and resources at yanatallonhicks.com.
