Bizarro Briefs: Hipster Dogs Don’t Need Shots

Hipster Dogs Don’t Need Shots

The anti-vaccination movement has expanded — to include additional species. Many pet owners in Brooklyn are refusing to vaccinate their beloved canines, in some cases for fear that the vaccines will give the dogs autism, veterinarian Amy Ford told Brooklyn Paper — despite research that shows no links between vaccines and autism. She said the refusal comes most often from those who live in “hipster-y areas.” Dr. Stephanie Liff, a veterinarian of Brooklyn’s Clinton Hill neighborhood, said she likewise has seen an uptick in the refusals, but added that even if dogs were susceptible to autism — which she said she has not seen — the pet’s owners wouldn’t be able to tell. Liff stated bluntly that dogs are susceptible to many other diseases that can be prevented through vaccinations. “My patients eat dirt. They eat poop,” she said.

No One Would Have Believed It Anyway

Donald Trump landed the job as president of the United States, but apparently couldn’t close the deal to become the fictional U.S. president in the movie Sharknado 3. Trump was in serious talks with the filmmakers in 2015 after their first pick — Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin — turned them down. Trump, who was at the time weighing a run to be the real-life president, delayed in getting back to the producers, and they ultimately gave the role to Mark Cuban. After the switch, the producers got an angry note from Trump’s lawyer saying Trump wanted the role and would sue. The lawsuit never took place and Trump’s lawyer denied ever sending such a note.

A Strict Class System

Panama-based Copa Airlines offers complimentary blankets to its customers in business class, but don’t try to share with those in economy. A woman who was bumped up to business class as part of that airline’s loyalty program tried to give her son in economy her blanket. She was stopped by a flight attendant, who then verbally assaulted and pushed her, the woman claimed. The woman spoke back, indignant, and was escorted off the flight by police after the plane landed. The airline denied the woman’s story, stating that she was disruptive and aggressive towards the crew member. The airline and the mother have both filed lawsuits against one another.

Not a Dog-Lover

A menace to the canine community will serve several years in prison after killing one toy poodle and injuring another. The man, who lives in the Oak Lawn suburb of Chicago, posed as the two dogs’ owner when responding to a Facebook ad of someone who found them. He paid a reward to the one who found them, and then drove them to the top of a parking garage and threw them to the ground. One dog died and the other survived with broken legs after undergoing surgery. The man was sentenced to five years in prison for felony aggravated animal cruelty, which will be served concurrently with a six-year sentence for violating his probation on an unrelated drug conviction.

Don’t Want To Pay $125? How About $1 Million.

A Dallas-based beauty blogger and her husband — appalled at having to pay a $125 fee for their wedding photo album cover — successfully attempted to torpedo their photographer’s business. They are now on the hook to pay the photographer about $1 million in damages after a judge determined that they misled NBC reporters and their social media following, resulting in a viral story that tanked the photographer’s business, according to the Washington Post. While they told the NBC reporter that there was no mention of the fee in their contract, a jury determined that the Dallas couple should have known about the charge and — rather than make it into a vendetta — should have just paid it and moved on.

Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One …

Seven Roman Catholic priests-in-training tried to walk into a bar, but they were stopped at the door and asked to leave. The bar, on Quay Street in Southeast Wales, has a policy of not allowing in “stag” or “fancy dress” parties, because they have been trouble in the past, an employee told the BBC. The “fancy dress” they were wearing was their frocks. The bar manager got wind of what was going on and intervened on the priests’ behalf, inviting them in as soon as he learned that they were priests. When they walked back inside, there was a round of applause from the clientele, and a round of drinks on the house for the seminary students.

Injustice Is Nearly Blind

A photograph of six empty bus seats sent many Islamophobic (and possibly nearsighted) citizens of Norway into a rage this week. At a glance, the seats kind of look like women wearing burqas. When it was posted to a anti-immigration Facebook group called “Fedrelandet viktigst” meaning “Fatherland first,” it attracted more than 100 comments, in which people called the image scary, frightening, and tragic. Norway is currently considering a law that would ban the burqa. The person who posted the photo did so as a joke and said he was shocked so many people fell for it.

Read The Sign

Flint-based rapper Cliff King Mac stood on a busy street corner holding a cardboard sign this week, but rather than asking for money, the sign promised the opposite. “I am not homeless. I got cars, I got houses and a son on the way. I’m giving because I’m blessed. Do you need $$?” The rapper, who said he was inspired by God, gave away about $200 to passing motorists. Some were stunned and took the money. Others refused but offered handshakes instead. Some people sent messages asking where they could donate to potential future giveaways, the rapper said.

Bagging More Than They Bargained For

An Arkansas couple had trouble with people harassing their pet donkeys for years and so decided to set up a camera to find out what was going on. What they captured on film was a 49-year-old man having sex with them. The man was arrested this week and charged with five counts of cruelty to animals. In a strange twist, the man placed a bag over the donkey’s head during sex.

Best Parking Ticket Of This Guy’s Life

A man who cried foul after receiving a parking ticket from the city of Los Angeles was just approved to receive $650,000. He took the city to court after he tried unsuccessfully to challenge the ticket and won on the basis that the city outsourced its appeal approval system to a subcontractor for the company Xerox, which denied most ticket appeals, even those with evidence that tickets had been wrongly issued. The suit went forward in 2014 and was upheld in superior court in 2016. The California Supreme Court decided it would not hear the case over a parking ticket, so the man’s lower court ruling stood.

Rave Review

The Emoji Movie got terrible reviews during its release, but at least one man in New Jersey seemed to enjoy himself during a screening over the opening weekend. The man was seated in the back row of a New Jersey theater, and a woman told management he was masturbating. Police, who were called later in the day, are now looking for the man.

Nothing To See Here …

Two young women taking care of a baby in Hackensack, New Jersey, got a surprise when a man broke into their home and tried to shower with one of them. One of them, who was in the shower, when the man entered, hid behind the shower curtain as he took off his clothes. She grabbed a towel and ran into another room with her sister and the baby, then locked the door and called the police. When they arrived, they found him washing dishes and claiming to be a caretaker. Police led him out the door in handcuffs, and charged him with burglary and lewdness.

Dave Eisenstadter can be reached at deisen@valleyadvocate.com.

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