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So Many Losers (via email)
I can’t believe that the first term of The Present Occupant Of The White House (TPOOTWH) is already 1/8 finished. Time just flies by when you’re great again!
If you listen to the “lamestream” media, you’d think he had a rough six months, but the problem is with Congress. Too bad he can’t do what Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro did and just appoint his own Congress. That would fix everything.
The truth is he’s already achieved all his election goals. The media just won’t cover it. The Great Wall of Mexico is already built and they paid double what they should have paid because, “We want to keep the Gringos out.” Plus TPOOTWH stiffed the contractor and generously donated the savings to his own pocket. He reduced unemployment by making sure that every lawyer in the country is hired by his own family. His Election Integrity Commission will insure our elections have the same integrity that he has. So much integrity, that you’ll be tired of it.
He’s already the greatest president ever created by God. But rather than putting him on Mount Rushmore, let’s re-carve it so it’s only of him. Instead of those “loser presidents” it could be a sculpture of him carving a statue of himself. He’d like that. Why should the guy who invented the teddy bear be up there? The only thing that Washington did was build that bridge to nowhere in New York. TPOOTWH is a way better president then Lincoln ever was. He prefers presidents who weren’t assassinated. I mean if Lincoln was such a great president, why did they assassinate him? But I digress.
TPOOTWH does have some goals left to achieve. If he attacks Venezuela and North Korea, he only has one more to go before he sets the record for most wars started by a president. He still needs to appoint Vladimir Putin and David Duke to the Supreme Court and break George Bush’s record for the most time by any president spent on vacation. Isn’t being great again greater then great?
— Andy Morris-Friedman, Hadley
A Psychotic Horse Named Trump (via email)
There is a scene in the film The Birdcage, in which the character played by Robin Williams finds himself caught up in circumstances of his creation that are becoming increasingly chaotic. Describing his plight, he says, “I’ve never felt such tension. It’s like riding a psychotic horse toward a burning stable.” Hmmm?
In January, it seemed a sure bet that the stream of irrationality flowing from the White House would be tempered by extraordinary demands as the job shaped the man. But eight months on, as chaos deepens, irrationality is now the coin of the realm. The president, over-matched by his responsibilities, has devolved, metaphorically speaking, into the psychotic horse taking the nation with him on a descent into instability and madness.
Thomas Hobbes theorized that civil society checked “the natural condition of mankind,” which is “war of every man against every man.” Though civility is looking tattered of late, the nation is a ways off from “the natural condition of mankind” becoming the new reality. Still, Mr. Trump appears determined, for reasons impervious to logic and common sense, to drive the country in that direction.
It is past time the herd realize the psychotic horseman is not moving the citizenry on to greener pastures, but toward the railhead which terminates at the slaughter house. Pass the steak sauce.
— Jack Tulloss, Belchertown
CT River Speed Limit (via email)
I love that our community gets to live and play on the beautiful Connecticut River. Lately, however, I’ve noticed that a number of motor boat operators seem to be unaware of Massachusetts’ rule (323 CMR 2.12(4) regarding the special speed limit for the area defined on mass.gov as the “Connecticut River/Reach.” The rule states that “no motorized vessel shall be operated at a speed greater than 15 m.p.h. from about Turner’s Falls to Hatfield. This summer, especially, many boats are exceeding the speed limit. This is especially important considering that much, if not all, of this stretch is part of the Connecticut River Greenway State Park and is habitat for wildlife, including nesting sites for bald eagles.
I’m hoping that having this in the paper will bring the existence of this speed limit to the attention of a wider audience. In addition, if the speed restriction is not already posted at the various boat launch areas in our region, perhaps putting up some prominent signage would help boaters keep this in mind.
— Christy Grecsek, Sunderland