This kind of thing happens all the time to us at the Rendezvous, but last night’s example was especially telling and infuriating. I was talking to a fellow at the bar, a first-time customer, who asked if I own the place. I explained that I did, with three partners, all of whom happened to be in the room – Mark, behind the bar, and Chris and Emily, who are married, sitting at the banquette, enjoying the evening’s entertainment.* I pointed at Mark, then at Chris and Emily, while speaking their names, to show the guy, who then says, "So there are three of you altogether?" to which I replied, patiently, "No, four," after which I again pointed out the remaining three of us, Chris, Emily, Mark, after which, I swear to god, the guy said, "I only see three." At that point I again said, very slowly, while pointing at each of us, "Chris is a partner, Emily is a partner, Mark is a partner, and I am a partner." And even then, even fucking then, he seemed perplexed, stared at me blankly. As I’ve mentioned previously in these pages, very often people think of Emily as partner-Chris’-wife, while no one has ever, to my knowledge, mistaken Chris for partner-Emily’s-husband. But last night was just beyond belief. The woman partner was completely invisible to him no matter what I said or did. I don’t know why I keep being shocked by this, but over and over, I am. This isn’t the goddamn ’50s, fellas (to be fair, ladies too have failed to comprehend Emily’s share in the venture) – people, wake up! Women own businesses, even a bar! ArrrrggggghhhH!!!!!
***
*For those of you who live in the area, last night was our second visit from a band calling themselves the LPs. Once a month, a bunch of area hotshot musicians –
[if you don’t believe me, google last night’s crew: Peter Mulvey, Barry Rothman (of Kosher Ham), David Goodrich, Kris Delmhorst (actually, Kris was nursing her month-old on the sidelines last night, but she’s a core LP memeber – sadly I don’t know the name of the great stand-up bassist who did play). Jason Smith, Jeffrey Foucault, and Zak Trojano of Rusty Belle sitting in on bongos]
– get together and, as a side project, rehearse once or twice and then just show up and play an album they love (and play it brilliantly, adoringly). Last night it was Tom Waits’ Rain Dogs. The month before it was Neil Young’s Comes a Time, and, after a September hiatus, in October (10/16) they’ll be doing one of my all-time favorites, Elvis Costello’s classic My Aim is True. In the future, they’re talking about Tom Petty, Black Sabbath(!!!) and so much more, everything from Devo to Blondie to Willie Nelson. It’s a very special night, really it is – come see!
