It’s no longer breaking news—in just the last few months, seven young gay/queer men have taken their own lives after being homophobically bullied. And though I’d love to write the usual column about cockrings or strap-ons, it can’t go unacknowledged that the world of sex and sexuality can (unfortunately) be much bigger and more complicated than that. LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning) bullying and suicides are nothing new: 84.5 percent LGBT students report having experienced verbal harassment at school (GLSEN National School Climate Survey, 2009) and a 2009 Massachusetts Youth Risk Survey shows that gay, lesbian and bisexual youth are up to four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers (www.mass.gov/cgly).
With the internet, today’s bullied youth are fighting an entirely different battle than previous generations of LGBTQ students, with bullying not only taking place in the school yard, but also in the home through the plugged-in world of instant messaging, social networking sites and text messages. Unfortunately, the constant connectivity that comes with these technological social tools have been abused in these recent tragedies, from Tyler Clementi’s privacy being fatally violated when a sexual encounter between him and another man was non-consensually filmed and streamed live onto the internet two days before his suicide (abcnews.go.com) to violent images and hate-speech encouraging LGBTQ suicides being posted on the very Facebook page made to commemorate the gay youth who’ve recently died.
While this rightly fuels recent debates about privacy, accountability, and the internet, it can’t go unnoticed that social networking sites and the internet have also facilitated a huge, positive backlash to these terrible events in the forms of the It Gets Better Project and the Trevor Project. It Gets Better (itgetsbetterproject.com) was recently founded by writer Dan Savage in response to young LGBTQ suicides, saying that life as a LGBTQ person does get better. This online archive of videos made by anyone who wants to make one (LGBTQ or straight) shares personal stories of overcoming bullying and other messages of hope. Starting as a small group of YouTube videos made by mostly LGBTQ community members, this project has gone viral in the last month, boasting hundreds of videos from the girl next door, to the New York City Gay Men’s Chorus to President Obama. Working closely with It Gets Better, the Trevor Project (thetrevorproject.org) is the first nationwide, 24/7 crisis hotline (1-866-4-U-Trevor) working to prevent LGBTQ suicides through online and telephone intervention and other advocacy programs. (For local support in Northampton and Greenfield, check out communityaction.us for information on their confidential social and support groups for LGBTQ youth ages 12-21).
Yes, LGBTQ bullying and suicides have been going on forever. So, why this viral reaction now? Because now that I can “friend” the Obamas and Lady Gaga on Facebook, we all feel that, yes, it is a small world after all? Because the It Gets Better Project is the next online publicity stunt for celebrities to “tweet” about?
I wonder about this. But then I think, who cares? Whether or not Obama is influenced by the pop culture points it gives him to make an It Gets Better video is unimportant. Because the president of the United States, religious leaders and high school groups are reaching out to LGBTQ youth, telling them their lives are worth living. Because Larry King is talking about this on CNN. Because a link to itgetsbetterproject.com posted on MySpace can reach millions of LGBTQ youth in middle America, telling them what LGBTQ youth did not hear often enough 10 years ago: you are not the only LGBTQ person in the world. Or even in Alabama. Maybe my ’80s-baby self is too susceptible to the latest viral internet video, but when I watch people like Erikson Young telling LGBTQ youth that “it gets better” in American sign language, it gives me chills. Because it’s already better. And I can’t wait to see how good it’ll get.
