Over the years it’s become clear to me that I love weddings. This has become especially true since I started performing wedding ceremonies. When you are meeting couples for the express purpose of officiating their weddings, you are offered glimpses into love at different ages and stages. You learn about the people, and their love for one another. You learn about their path toward one another and their shared path. You learn about their families and friends. You get to see—bird’s eye view—their belief in one another and their dreams for the future. You receive, through this process, a big slug of hope. Hope is delicious.
And it goes without saying that being welcomed into people’s big moments is a gift. I find the words that always surface for me are honored, humbled and grateful.
I didn’t get into this whole wedding celebrant gig on purpose. I did so after hearing my pal, Evan, tell me about performing a wedding for his best friend and having it snowball to the point where he began doing weddings for people he didn’t know, you know, like a little job. To which I said, “Evan, I’d be great at that.”
My sister agreed and promptly enlisted me for some future date after she actually got engaged.
Just like for Evan the ability to perform weddings came in handy. I’ve helped some friends out. That’s what friends are for, after all. Then, I helped friends of friends out. And, yes, the I-can-marry-people thing snowballed.
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Yesterday, I got to preside over a particularly joyous wedding. I use that word particularly because this couple so glowed and the people surrounding them so wholly affirmed their graciousness—as individuals and as a couple.
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The afternoon before I’d planned to be at Amherst College’s Johnson Chapel for the wedding rehearsal. Turns out I crossed the river earlier in order to say goodbye to Jerry Liebling. Beyond all his considerable greatness, he was a charming, elegant man I so enjoyed. The afternoon was a Mobius of how rich the human experience is. Sad as the first event was, our gathering in the heavy grey afternoon felt extremely affirming: of friendships, community, family, love, art and living honestly. You can’t ask for more from this life.
Saturday, the skies cleared and blue and sunshine and puffy clouds presided over the bride and groom and their family and friends. It felt like the skies held the sadness and the joy, one after the next.
