Hi Yana,
My boyfriend and I have been together for six years but only recently discovered that he can have multiple orgasms. If he puts his penis back inside me or if I stimulate just the tip a few seconds after he has orgasmed he can ejaculate a second time.
At first he was self conscious about the mess and didn’t want to do it again. But after reassuring him that I don’t mind a mess we have done it more than once. I’m thrilled that I can do this for him!
What I’m wondering is, what exactly is the fluid that comes out the second time? He says it feels like he needs to pee. Is it urine? It’s clear and odorless. There is also a lot more of it compared to the first orgasm. I’ve heard of men having multiple orgasms but can they actually come more than once???
Thanks,
What the Stuff?
Dear WtS,
Well, my official answer is: I don’t know. But I’ll tell ya that Googling “clear ejaculate” sure does bring up some fun images.
Here’s what I can tell you about penises, ejaculate, and multiple orgasms. An orgasm and the process of ejaculating are actually two different things. An orgasm is essentially a glorified series of muscle contractions, centered around the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles that span the pelvic bowl. Ejaculation typically accompanies penile orgasm but it doesn’t always, nor does it have to in order to qualify the orgasm as an orgasm.
The art of controlling one’s PC muscle contractions via certain exercises, stimulation breaks, and breathing techniques is behind the classic Tantric Sex quest for the multiple penile orgasm. This process essentially focuses on having the muscle contractions of orgasm without “allowing” the ejaculate to sneak by. To do this, people are instructed to clench their PC muscles to stop the release of ejaculate before the super official “point of no return” is reached.
The idea is that while the ejaculate won’t come, the muscle contractions that make up an orgasm will. And then again and again until you’ve had your fill and then you’re like fiiiiine I guess the ejaculate can sneak through now.
So, what’s the deal with your boyfriend and his one classically cloudy round of ejaculate and then his follow-up crystal-clear-as-a-chandelier encore?
Well, there are a few different fluids that make up ejaculate. One is prostatic fluid which is a major player in ejaculation as it basically bubble wraps sperm to make sure that it can make it to its final, cervical destination. Prostatic fluid is (surprise, surprise) secreted by the prostate which the urethra (the urine superhighway) passes through on its way down the shaft of the penis.
I’m wondering if your BF’s familiar feeling of peeing might actually be the contractions of his prostate squeezing the urethra, mimicking the feeling of urine passing through. I assume that he would know if he was actually peeing out urine and if he is, that might warrant a doctor chat about UTIs.
Sperm are responsible for the cloudiness of ejaculate while prostatic fluid is generally responsible for the white coloring. If his second round of ejaculation is “just clear,” I’m going to completely guess that the first round of ejaculate used up all (or almost all) of the sperm and prostatic fluid and that whatever is left over is what’s being expelled during Round 2.
When I Google “clear ejaculate” nothing points to anything medically alarming. But despite what we’d all love to think, Google actually never went to medical school, so if anything feels worrisome, BF should check in with a doctor (which I certainly am not).
Finally, I’m left curious about a couple of things. One is, if we know that the muscle contractions of orgasm can be separate from ejaculation proper, is your BF experiencing another “orgasm” with this second round of ejaculate? Or is he simply just ejaculating without the sensation of orgasm?
Secondly, what is with the uptick in readers being so committed to a neat-and-tidy sex life?? Sex is messy, my friends! Generally speaking, fluid excretion is what most of us are going for during this exchange so don’t fret about it too much. That’s what showers, towels, washing machines, condoms, gloves, and latex bodysuits are for!
Yana Tallon-Hicks is a relationship therapist, sex educator, and writer living in the Pioneer Valley. You can find her work and her professional contact information on her website, yanatallonhicks.com.
