Talk Dirt to Me
Oocyan
Back in November an interloper showed up in our neighborhood. She was in the middle of a molt and didn’t look healthy at all. After posting “found chicken” notes on the local list serves a few times, I decided to keep her. She filled out nicely over...Warrigal Greens
I harvested the last spinach from the garden a few weeks ago and have been keeping a bag in the fridge. I finished it off last night in a little sauté with some garlic scapes. This went on some pasta with tomato sauce. Garlic scapes make everything taste...In my room
At 212 on Rolling Stone magazine’s list of “500 Greatest Songs of All Time” is “In My Room” sung by the Beach Boys and written by Brian Wilson and his buddy Gary Usher in Wilson’s bedroom when he was still a teen. Their age, in...Indigent Larva
This summer I’ve accepted a challenge: I’m spending a few weeks with unscheduled children. I’ve never had this extended “opportunity” before because I’ve always been occupied so the children have gone to summer camps. One of the...Salmonella
The concept of species is tough enough in vertebrates, where the most common definition is animals that interbreed and produce fertile offspring. Essentially the parents give their young a bit of their DNA. Bacteria are kind of free and easy with their DNA;...Separatist beetles
According to “Colours of conflict” an article on The Economist’s website, the pro-Russian rebels in Ukraine wear a multicolor ribbon to show their loyalty to Russia. They show the colors of the Order of St. George: orange and black. The Ukrainian...Fits in your mouth perfectly.
In a grainy video on YouTube, Ray comfort and Kirk Cameron discuss the “atheist’s nightmare.” Exhibit A, well and B too for that matter, is the Cavendish banana. The banana, they argue, was perfectly “designed” for consumption by humans:...Hobo
Despite their general indigence, my boarders have begun to do some minor tasks around the house (e.g. clear their dishes and feed the cats); they are participants in the work-life of the household. I’ve recently realized I know or have met several people who...Chopping kindling
I go canoe camping each summer with a group of friends. Every year we play kubb, a Sweedish game that partakes equally from horse shoes, bocce and somewhat more equally from beer. The object of kubb, as with most games is to win. Essentially five logs standing on one...On the borderline
We’ve been hearing a lot about the border recently. Not my indigent boarders, our southern border. One of our major political parties seems to think that an influx of frightened children means we should build a bigger wall. The Governor of Texas, Rick Perry, is...Ordering day
I ride the bus to work when the roads are too occluded with snow for safe biking. On the bus I can pick away at work on my computer, or play freecell. I can’t help but notice that there are other people on the bus; sometimes they do interesting things. This...Dangleberries
We’re been on “vacation” on the fractionally-less exclusive of Massachusetts’ barrier islands. One might be excused for imagining lazy days whiled away in the sun before cocktails on the lanai, but this is not the case. When the indigent...Dark Side of the Coop
April may be the cruelest month, but February doesn’t bestow wanton kindness. Even on clear days the sun doesn’t withholds heat and on most days it strains to break the clouds. This deprives us of the opportunity to synthesize vitamin D, and brings on...Porcelain Berries
I don’t think it’s still there, but a few years ago I complimented the bakers at the Hungry Ghost on a vine growing just outside their door. The berries were in various state of ripeness going from green through yellow to purple and blue. The plant had...Onion Seeding
Students tend to leave a lot of detritus behind when they leave the lecture hall I teach in. I usually check to see if anything looks valuable; supplementary income always helps. Usually though the debris field consists of oil stained picked over food containers. A...Ice cream man
I read Remembrance of Things Past twenty years ago so don’t actually remember the famous scene in which the narrator bites into a madeleine cake and is transported back to his youth. Your garden variety English nerd will point out (or Wikipedia) that the scene...Budnip
A few weeks ago my sister forwarded me a clip from the fretosphere featuring a young girl who had conducted an “experiment” with sweet potatoes (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exBEFCiWyW0). Our hero, Elyse, took a conventional sweet potato and placed it in...Mexican Bean Beetle
A lot of my crops have been harvested. The onions and garlic are in and curing. Except for some remnants the potatoes are out. The peas have long been eaten and the first few plantings of green beans, carrots and lettuce are all spent. These have left big gaps that...Duck Boots
I have always been stingy with household climate control. Even when I lived in Texas I kept the air conditioner off. It was partly the expense; I barely had money for Lone Star tallboys back then and I had priorities. Beyond the money problem I worried about the...Indian Pipe
Each year I go with a collection of friends, the boarders and the boss to the Adirondacks for a camping and canoeing trip. We’ve been going for years and it has become one of the highlights of the year. This year was the first that the whole Rounds inequitable...Raising Boarders
Raising boarders My onion seeds germinated quickly and uniformly. But they suffered from ass over tea-kettle syndrome. Onion seeds send up an enormous shoot before their roots really get a chance to sink at all. Perhaps “enormous” gives you an unreasonable...Bt
The boss loves Brussels sprouts. Her father bakes them with olive oil and salt (he has a heavy hand with both) and she pops them like candy. So I always grow a few plants. I’ve never had overwhelming success. Sure we’ll eat Brussels sprouts a few times a...Physics
String theory gives me the howling fantods. These theoretical strings are the most elementary of particles: one dimensional “objects” that have different quantum states. It is postulated (love that passive voice) that matter arises from these strings and...Chewing on the grindstone
I’m pretty happy with my tomato harvest, I haven’t thought that in a long time. Late blight, early blight and septoria take their toll. Even though I grew all blight resistant varieties, they weren’t impervious to the various fungi. Nevertheless,...Mangoes
Sixteen years ago, before the boss hired me, we went to Europe with two others to ride on our bicycles in a big circle. It’s hard to imagine why one would go so far just to ride in a circle, but we were young and therefore quite foolish. We started in Bonn,...Berry experts
I have small path of Alpine strawberries that doesn’t get a lot of attention. I weed it a few times a year and that really seems to be all it needs. The only real threat is the bindweed, so as long as I pull that back occasionally, I get berries. The youngest...Muck
The winter has felt long. It’s probably more like what winters were like years ago, but that didn’t change the fact that we’ve become weak and expect some amount of warmth to return in March. So last weekend was my first weekend out in the muck. The...Harvest Guilt
On my way home from work today I passed through the center of Northampton. For once I didn’t notice the reading on the Silverscape sign: -90. I’m not sure if it’s Fahrenheit or Celsius. I’m hoping Fahrenheit because that’s a lot warmer...Calvin cycle
My onions have completed the first arc of their migration. They begin, at least for me, as seeds that magically arrive in my mailbox. I plant them in soil blocks then put them under lights in the basement. Once the weather has warmed enough I carry them out to the...Poke things with sticks
Eons ago before I had even met the boss, before, in fact, I knew I needed a boss, a friend and I spent a week in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. We made all sorts of poor choices while there, I like to tell myself I am a better person for them. But one good choice was...Reproduction
I noticed them just a week and half ago: the brave garlic spears jutting up through the protective mulch. The mulch insulates the soil so that it remains a more constant temperature. In early spring that means colder. This prevents frost heaves, but it also slows...RateMyGarden.com
Everything gets reviewed these days, anonymously, and often none too kindly. Is it for the better? Most of my garden’s reviewers offer anodyne comments or just smile, but what if they used RateMyGardener.com? Mrs. Beanbeetle: under the leaves by the tree 8/15/14...Faith
I am not a person of faith. Though I participated in religious services as a child, I no longer do. I’m not sure if I had faith then, but I did believe what I was told. I didn’t question whether there was a God because the adults said there was one. High...Piles
Some years ago a friend of mine and I were backpacking in the Adirondacks. As so often happens when backpacking, our minds, well really his mind, turned to waste. Waste is a much bigger problem when far from plumbing and a municipal sanitation system. My friend...Foraging
Sauerkraut, and garlic are all that remain of last year’s garden – at least all that’s edible. This season’s new growth provides me with lettuce, spinach and chives. I can make a hell of a salad, but it’s a little calorie thin. I try to...Deer eating crackers
I spent a recent weekend on Fire Island hoping to catch a striped bass as I did last year. The fish won this year. I am not a particularly accomplished fisherman, whereas the fish are quite accomplished fish; they have an advantage. The surf didn’t help either...Markets
We live in a valley that is nearly saturated with farm stands and farmers’ markets. I frequent a few stands, mostly for asparagus and corn. For the weekly market though, I have a definite preference. I won’t say which one as it might generate an angry...On growing peppers
My garden and yard are now in full fall regalia. Leaves are scattered over an unevenly mown lawn; sticks blown down by storms and toys tossed aside by children accent the disarray. I’ve moved perhaps half of the compost to the garden but only spread a few beds;...Planting Cherries
According to lots of “sources” on the internet there’s a Chinese proverb: “the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best time is now.” I think “Chinese proverb” just lends the saying the aura of wisdom. It...Lembas and physics
Magic violates the laws of physics. In some states it violates other laws as well. I suppose with the recent election some forms of magic may become the law in certain southern states. In the reality based part of the country (does Massachusetts still count?), what...Editing
Buying an older house means you will inherit some things from the previous owners. Unfortunately they seldom leave high end stereo systems. More often they leave things like 100 pound bags of Portland cement that have a rip down the middle. They’ll hide this...Fear of the unknown
I, like most animals am afraid of unknown things that appear to be dangerous to my livelihood. Charlie Baker scares me. Like me, my chickens fear strange and unknown things; their acceptance of me suggests they do fine with strange and known things. A hawk or a...Spittlebugs
I’ve happened upon an insect I haven’t see in a while: a spittle bug. I found several of the offending loogis along the stem of a newly planted sage. The “spittle” is actually repurposed plant phloem. “Repurposed” in this case means...Sick Chicken
Last night on the bus I was thinking about my chicken. That’s not against the rules on a PVTA bus, though “failure to meet minimum standards for public health and hygiene” is. I will assume that either I have met the minimum standards for public...Cloudy with a chance of ninjas
As I write we’re experiencing our first snow fall of the year, which also happens to be our first snowstorm. I’m a weather denier as a habit. This is not the same as a climate change denier. People who refuse to accept the evidence for anthropogenic...Wolf Foot
This winter we haven’t gotten enough snow. “Enough” is what allows for cross country skiing. Even in New Hampshire where I spent part of the holidays the snow cover was patchy or absent. We passed a very wet hour tubing at a ski resort. The wet snow...Conifers
On Christmas day I enact my most gratifying statement of rebellion against the dominant paradigm I haul the Christmas tree out of the house, cut off the branches and throw it in the brush pile on top of several previous years’ trees. The boarders don’t...Little Boxes Made of ticky tacky
It’s that most irritating time of the year. The indentured boarders are big on Christmas, quelle suprise. The youngest has even launched a campaign to celebrate Hanukah concurrently. Thus far he’s only asked for Latkes and a menorah, but I’m pretty...Vapor
Another minor tragedy struck the household last weekend: Elliot broke the seltzer maker. He didn’t just break it by the expensive piece of plastic junk off the counter, he broke it all to bits inside. He must be practicing to be a parent. The seltzer maker we...PIebald spotting
I’ve been riding the trail from Northampton to UMass frequently for six years or so and for the first time I’ve noticed a few black Eastern gray squirrels along the way. That sounds goofy, but the species is called the Eastern gray squirrel and, well,...E-Edition
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