I and Jake made the following plan to bring cpt slow back to his senses, since he has been being even slower than usual, if you can believe that, and we have been worried abt him, if you can believe that too. He has just been holed up in his iceshack on Card Pond, and we have felt that what he needs is a kind of shock to jolt him up to speed, kind of like when you give a little shove to the needle on the record player when the record skips. Not that anyhone listens to records anymore, but that is what you used to do and that is what we wanted to do with capt slow.
The first part of our plan was to remind him how this one time many years ago i neglected to put a piece of plywood over my icehole and that nite abt a hundred eels jumped out of my icehole to get at the bait i had left in my shack. Ever since then, i and jake told him, you got to be real careful to either take yr bait w/ you or else hang it from the top rafter of the ice shack and you got to put a good solid weight on top of the plywood or else eels will jump out of yr icehole.
well, cpt slow dint believe none of that, which we dint expect him to, even tho it really did happen.
anyway, we set out last nite with all them frozen eels we have been keeping on sawdust for a rainy day, like i have explained before. we figured i wld lure him out of the iceshack by telling him i had some electronics i needed him to fix, and while i and him were away from the shack, jake wld put all them eels into the shakc. we figured we had abt five foot tall worth of eels and so when cpt slow came back to his ice shack all them eels wld fall out on him when he opened the door and then we cld say, See? What did we tell you abt them eels jumping out of yr icehole? And all of this wld achieve "our goal of startling him out of his langor," which is the way jake put it. which prettly much startled me out of my langor, since jake dont say much, and then all of a sudden he comes out w/ something like that.
so that was our plan and we brot the eels out and jake hid with them at the edge of card pond and i nocked on cpt slows ice house door and there was a scuffling and a russling and it then became clear to me why he has been so slow and even standoffish to i and jake and dody. it is b/c he has a girl in his icehouse and he dint and dont want us to know. and then i remembered how he had bot a russian girl over that ebay store on the internet, and everything became real clear in my head, and i backed away from the icehouse and told jake that me and him had to nix our plan. which ment that since we dint want to cart all those eels all the way back home, we just left them at the edge of card pond. which is a shame, b/c if there is one thing i do not like to do, it is to waste a big pile of frozen eels.
