Last year i worked it out w/ Bumps Diner that i wld take their coffee grounds and i have got to tell you, that stuff is like gold. Not literally b/c gold is a lot heavier and is a different color, but you know what i mean. anyway, I spose it is the cafeine but whatever it is, all winter those worms have been having worm-sex like crazy and this year looks to be a bumper crop and i have got worms coming out my ears! Not literally of course. Not yet, anyway. Someday, maybe. b/c i am not a big fan of funeral homes and wld prefer to just be buried in the ground and i trust jake and or dody will take care of that whenever the day comes. so i spose i CLD have worms coming out of my ears, someday.
But that is beside of the point b/c what i wanted to say is this bumper crop of worms is perfect timing b/c i and jake have recently come into possession of abt eleven thousand little tupperware containers. It is a long story how that happened. But the point is that they are perfect sizes for abt 20 worms apiece! Boy oh boy, i can taste the pickerel sandwiches already!
I will now tell you something very serious: a lot of the time things do not go the way i want them to go. It is just a fact that sometimes things do not pan out the way i want them to. Like yesterday when i sprayed the concentrated female bobcat urine on jakes boots b/c travis had told me abt how it had fairy moans in it that wld make all the male bobcats excited and i was looking forward to all of the bobcats seeing jake and him having to whack them off w/ a stick. I mean that last part very literally in two ways, by the by. But then he went and wore a different pair of boots. It’s was real disappointing for me, and it’s just that sometimes i feel like i cannot win for losing. But not today! Today i cannot lose for winning! I have got eleven thousand tupperware containers filled w/ the plumpest fattest squirreliest worms you ever seen! I and jake and dody and travis and cpt slow and oola and the Petes Turkowski and Big Tiny have been filling them up since dawn and driving them to gas stations all over the place! Today has been gravy all day long! Worm gravy!
So anyway, go get my worms! They are in gas stations all over the place! I guarentee they will be the only worms in authentic Tupperware containers and that is how you will know they came from me. They will be in the refridgerater section and when you open the Tupperware the worms will be all still like they are sleeping but that is just b/c they are cold. This weekend if you get to yr fishing hole and they are still cold, put a little Ben Gay on them. That will warm them up real quick! You can thank me later!
