What happened is the other day we dug up that fence from those summer people up the road w/ that dog what barks all the time. Like they say, summer people and some are not, and these people are the ladder. And then we re-dug that fence in so we cld make a invisible pen for that beefalo we have yet to slaughter and then Cpt Slow has went on ebay and bot us a extra large electrical collar what wld fit around the beefalo since that was something we did not have and w/o the collar the fence wld not work. Cpt Slow found the extra large collar right away b/c he is really good at shopping at ebay, having bot his fiancee from estonia that way.
So today we had the fence dug in around the beefalo and cpt slow came over w/ the really big electrical collar. The beefalo did not much like the electrical collar at first but then we painted it gold & put some spray glitter on it and so it had some bling to it and then the beefalo was okay w/ it. But the beefalo just walked right thru the invisible fence like it was not even there. We upped the voltage as high as we cld but it did not make any difference to the beefalo. I thot for sure we wld at least make him think twice abt crossing the invisible fence but it was like there was no electric current happening at all.
It was around this time that jake was getting frustrated b/c I and him had spent a long time digging the trench to bury the wires of the invisible fence and he does not have the same faith in cpt slow that i do and he started telling cpt slow he had bot a dud collar and cpt slow said "I did not buy a dud collar jake and if you do not believe me why dont you put it around your neck and see what happens."
I am going to back up now and tell you abt this one time i took a whizz against an electric fence which is something i will never ever do again. And then there was this time when i was on an aluminum ladder in the rain and i was hanging some old xmas lites and i licked one of the wires and when i picked myself up a few minutes later i cld not find my shoes.
And that is kind of what happenned to jake. He put on that blinged-out collar and went running up to where we buried the fence and then he all of a sudden bounced back abt 15 ft like he walked right into a real aggressive but totally invisible trampoline. Then he lay on the ground w/ one of his feet smoking a little bit. After a while he got up and said to cpt slow, "I guess you are right. This is not a dud collar after all."
So that is where things sit right now. I cannot say as this is a satisfactory conclusion since the invisible fence does all of jackmonkey to the beefalo, which was the whole point of the operation. And i have had to pay Cpt Slow for the collar he bot, which since Bil Keanes check has bounced is kind of putting me in the hole. And on top of all those things that shock jake took has made his restless leg syndrome come back and all he does is complain and i have to listen to him. When i told him that it seemed like he has Restless Mouth Syndrome since he will not shut up for two minutes he got all quiet and i knew i hurt his feelings and when i apologized he said i was not being sympathetic and i have to admit i was not. So i said i was sorry and he said if i was REALLY sorry i wld put the collar on and see for myself what it was like.
Even tho it is dark out and after dinner, that is what i am going outside to do right now and i will let you know what happens.
