This is a complicated story so i will tell it slowly so you can follow it. It also has a part in it abt castrating sheep, so you might want to close yr eyes when you read that part.
I will start at the beginning and go in order:
The 1st thing what happened was that Bil Keane showed up in my dooryard w/ all the money he owed me! So do not believe what you hear abt Bil keane being a welsher on his poker debts, even tho it is me who has been saying it. b/c it turns out that Bil Keane is a standup fellow and a real straightshooter. If you do not remember, some time ago he got his car stuck in the mud and ended up staying the nite here and in the process of that we played poker and he lost $372.53 when he thot i was bluffing but i was not. And then he sent me a check but it bounced. I had gave up the money for lost when low and behold who shld show up in the dooryard yesterday morning but bil keane and what he owed me in CASH, which despite what those credit card fellows on tv want you to believe is still actually worth something. So Bil keane apologized up and down the dooryard for bouncing the check and offered a very roundabout explanation which i cld not follow but involved the NBA Finals and a fellow named Vig and if you were there you wld have taken a great pity on old bil keane, the way he looked at his shoes and kicked the dirt.
And the 2nd thing what happened is that once our debts were settled i and jake and bil keane went turtling and wldnt you know it but bil keane caught the biggest turtle of the six we caught and he even rowed the boat most of the time.
and then the 3rd thing what happened is that when we got back jake showed him heather mills leg, which is looking a little worse for the wear since jake has been custodian of it, i have to say.
and then the 4th thing what happened is when travis called to say he needed some help castrating a few of his rams b/c they have been getting overly randy. which if you ask me is entirely due to that time last april that the drug salesman ended up up here all lost and out of gas and while he came w/ me to get a gas can jake found a case of these blue viagra pills in the trunk of his car and shortly after that in an unrelated development jake had his idea abt making bumperstickers that said "fart twice if you like broccoli" but he needed money to print them up but since i dint have any money b/c bil keane had stiffed me on his poker debt and so jake asked travis but travis said No way am i giving you money for any dumb bumperstickers and so jake got mad and took a whole lot of those pills and scattered them around travises fields like they were easter eggs and ever since then travises sheep and ostriches have been all whatnot this and whatnot that and how-do-you-do and there-you-have-it and thats-a-fine-good-morning-rosie. So, as you can see, everything that comes around goes around, and wldnt you know it but our turtle catching champion bil keane is at the heart of the ruckus.
And then the 5th thing what happened is that we all of us trecked over to travises to castrate the sheep, but not 242 b/c 242 is a model sheep and i wld sooner jake get castrated then 242.
And that is where i have to stop this story for now b/c i and dody and bill keane and jake are having a late dinner and i do not want to spoil my appetite. We are have turtle sandwiches w/ Bil Keane, who is alive thanks to 242 and that is the next part of this story.
