So then what happened was that after we had cut off the sheep’s whatnots and wherewithals and had begun cutting off them rams horns and cauterizing them w/ travises heat gun, big tiny showed up w/ i and jakes package from canada, which we had been expecting ever since those porcupines started eating the underneath of my truck. back as soon as those prickerpossums started doing that i called up big tiny and placed an order for a box of blackmarket fishercats, which as everyone knows is the only thing what will eat a prickerpossum. so we had finished up w/ the sheep when big tiny pulled up w/ his truck and i and jake and travis headed out of the barn like it was xmas morning.
and wldnt you know it but big tiny got the order wrong! i wanted a half dozen fishercats and he got a half dozen FERRETS! now, what can you do w/ a ferret? stinky little creatures, ferrets. no use whatsover w/ porcupines, and you cant eat them b/c they are so skinny and bony even for soup or a stew, and they make lousy bait. so i was none to happy abt this deelopment which i had not foreseen but i probly shld have b/c altho i am never going to pretend to be the brightest lightbulb in the lamp shop, big tiny doesnt even know he has a lightbulb in the lamp shop, if you know what i mean.
anyhow, there we were, i and jake and big tiny and travis and all of us were scratching our heads and wondering how you return a wildanimal what you have bought on the black market and it did not occur to us that we had left old bil keane alone back there in the barn w/ those rams and a pile of horns and the heatgun.
now something you shld know abt bil keane is that he is he just wants to be one of the guys. like when i and jake and him were catching turtles, he kept saying how it was abt the most fun he had ever had, and if you had of heard him you wld have believed him but you wld have also thot, "Okay, Bil. I get the picture. You can kind of shut up now." And that time I have not even mentioned when I and him and dody and jake and cpt slow and oola went down to sportys to see honky tonka truck, which as everyone knows is cpt slows favorite band, and he kept clapping and yelling and flicking his cigarette lighter and it was like he was trying to show that he liked honky tonka truck just as much or even more than every one else.
What i am getting at is that while the rest of us were trying to figure out what to do w/ these ferrets bil was in the barn and he got to fooling w/ the heat gun like he seen travis do but he burned himself and dropped the heatgun on this pile of straw and wldnt you know it but the barn caught fire.
And now i am going to have to stop here b/c i and jake and bil keane are going nightcrawling to catch us some worms so tomorrow morning we can catch us some carp so we can transfer them to that pond those summer people built who also have that dog what barks all the time. i will tell you the last part of the story as soon as i can, i promise.
