Standing In The Shadows
Learning New Tricks
Every time I think about what elementary school calls upon a child to do, I start to feel almost dizzy. I mean there’s an array of subjects like math, reading, social studies, science and music, art, plus maybe a language. There’s all this stuff to...Twenty Years Ago Today…
When I’m talking with a couple about their upcoming wedding (the Internet is magical, and click-click-Sarah’s-a-minister, if of the Interweb variety; regardless, I talk to couples about their upcoming weddings—and then I marry them. Seriously,...Telling The Story
I woke up at loose ends. Well, actually, I woke first just before five and thought I heard Saskia crying and then thought I had dreamed I’d heard her crying when it was quiet and then heard her crying. The dear papa brought the girl to bed and got her a bottle...Then, There is Halloween
On my long list of things no one tells you about parenting—call this one #567—I’d put one simple word: Halloween. From all those childhood years of your own and those mounds of high fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated oils heaped on the supermarket...And Then It Got Worse…
This was the sentence my friend, Sam, uttered about his four month-old son just after his first sentence—“He started off sleeping really well”—and before his next—“It does get better again, right?” What’s the correct...Nano-Wha-Mo
There are a couple of things about our own personal stories I’ve learned in these decades on the planet. First, there’s not really one story for any story and stories change over time, or at least, their meanings change for us. Adoption, as I’ve...Community
A new school—for my seventh grader—offers lots of things: challenges—it’s not so easy to be new—and delights—the school newspaper, the mini-courses, the river study that takes place outdoors, the Chorus—and another perspective...Early November De-Clutter Update
I’ve spent much of this week furiously—fast and furiously—NanoWriWhatTheHeckAmIDoingMo. The rest of life is going on, too, and frankly, I’m exhausted! It’s a big week working on Preview Massachusetts’ stories, too. Every single time...Finding the What Matters Part
Note to others: when you push very hard, some things just fall apart. Yesterday, as I was typing rather furiously—Nano, that’s what I’m saying here—the phone rang and it was my seventh grader. The clock read 10:22 AM. “Mom?” he...Writing Update
If you’re a regular reader of this bloggity-blog, you know that I decided to do as my fifteen year-old begged, wheedled and cajoled me to do and join him in the NanoWriMo challenge to write a novel—in my case, a memoir—during the month of November. I...The Wave
As I wrote, this NanoWriteWhatYouKnowMo process is pretty exhausting. I’m going back to a time that was filled with uncertainty, and I’m a person who likes to be in control. Mostly, though, to become a parent is the most out of control experience, ever...Is There Such a Thing as Too Much Quiet?
Here’s one of those things you kind of know when you have a toddler: too much quiet, that’s a suspicious thing. So, during the few minutes I was focused upon making lunch (did you know that if you grate cheese and melt it and put it on a tortilla, it goes...Bittersweet, Sweet
I pretty much never want to turn back the big old hands of time. As much as there are things about getting older—grey hair or creaky knees—I don’t wholly adore, there are other things—a general comfort with being myself—that override the...Elemental
There aren’t many leaves left on the trees around here these days. Winter keeps insisting itself—frost in the morning, a really strong cold wind to push against walking up a hill, the light falling away quickly in the late afternoons, and darkness...Liking Stuff
In the ongoing attempt to weed through, well, everything (a losing proposition, be assured), a few days ago, I noted what is tucked away on my computer’s sidebar. Along with some unfinished essays and a cascade of unreturned emails, there’s the holiday...Thankful For…
Ten hours’ sleep (in-a-row) Healthy, happy children The most lovely friends ever Dearest spouse Nuance and complexity Family, with its bumps, bruises reality My little town Picture books Haiku Apples CSA farms Championing small farmers Seasons Handmade pottery...Briefly, Snow
We hit the road—and made it back home. The actual journey involved the highway, but it might as well have been the Oz mantra, tap your heels together three times, because being elsewhere was magical and being home again is kind of magical, too. We tend to take...Turning Toward December
Although there are all kinds of things my teen and tweenagers are into that aren’t exactly my style (reading fantasy and science fiction, Brussels sprouts) we share in what seems—to me—like far more in the way of interests than I remember having in...He(art) This Weekend
At heart, I’m a homebody. My life—which includes raising four kids, being quite community-focused, talking to people for some portion of my workdays, and an increasing dedicated to walking as many places as possible—belies this truth a bit. I think...On Princess Boys & Scrappy Girls
Sometimes, I have my own version of what I like to call only in Northampton moments. For example, this week I passed by two middle-aged guys standing in front of Starbucks and pointing to City Hall. One said, “I think the Dalai Lama spoke there.” Or, at my...Overnight
You know how sometimes it seems like kids grow overnight? A few weeks ago, it hit me that my twelve year-old tweenager seemed to have matured overnight. We were talking before bedtime and suddenly he was asking me about my writing project. A few days ago, he told me...Unbraided
When I was little, I practiced braiding a lot. I had long hair and I’d braid and re-braid my own hair. Like a waltz, there’s something melodic about the 1-2-3 of a braid. Now, I don’t braid my hair and yet all the multitasking comprising my days...The One in Which We Can't Use the Water
It’s one of those weekends. It all started Friday afternoon when I went to flip some laundry from washer to dryer (my laundry has gotten less drier dependent; I think I do three loads for the line to one for the dryer) and found some suspicious water...Water!
Sometimes, the music one hears isn’t music at all. For me, nearing noon on a Tuesday morning, it was the sound of all those construction vehicles I once knew by name (most especially during the tweenager’s toddlerhood, when he was quite obsessed with...Great Divides
Amongst the sentences I never expected to dream up: I can’t wait for the street to be torn up. Right now, our water problem has a temporary fix of a jerry-rigged septic—um, hole—in our front yard. Obviously, this inelegant—not to mention...Cookies (& Water)
Besides water, another theme this week in the frantically-trying-to-clean-up-majorly-for-our-craft-show household has been that part of holiday “prep” known as teacher gifts and end of year celebrations (continuing into next week, with Hilltown Charter...Sigh
If I could put one word to my day today it would be sigh. Maybe, I’m saying less a word than an exhalation, the actual motion of letting go a teeny-tiny bit. As in, the construction brigade is in front of my house* being loud (to me, this spells W-A-T-E-R and...Anthem for the Week
My parents’ wedding anniversary is a date—it was this week—that always pops into my consciousness with alarming clarity. My parents are divorced, haven’t been together since I was eight. So, isn’t it interesting that this date has such a...Of Fairy Girls, Disappointments, Family, and Friends
Under irony would be this true fact: I’ve spent weeks (months) sorting through stuff—think, small plastic objects, think, toys and more toys, think, paper clips, papers, the undone, the unsent, the what do I do with—only to make it easier for two big...How a Nice Jewish Girl Got Christmas
Winter break comes hard earned. Everyone’s tired. As the kids get older, they’re not only tired; they’re rundown. So are we. So far this winter break—we’re talking under a week here since all began vacation—we’ve had one...New Year's Eve Day 2010
So here we are on the final day of 2010 and I’ve been quietly mulling how to write something “year-end-y” (and failing). Like all years, endings and beginnings are more fluid than the neat markers provided by dates (first day of school, Rosh...Ring it in. Ring in the New Year
Even if you haven’t been reading this blog for long, you would probably not be surprised to know that I’m a lover of New Year’s Resolutions. Why? I never feel I do fill-in-the-blank enough, as in don’t work hard enough, don’t relax...Driver's Seat, Wave Riding (Mangled Metaphors)
I don’t think I can put into words my euphoria Monday morning. Four kids in school after such a long time of no-routine, I just dove in: returned emails, pitched stories, wrote invoices and thank you notes, and generally attended to all that good loose end...Pretty in Pink is So 1986; 2011 is the Year for Handsome in Pink
Even with a little derailment for Saskia’s tummy bug, I do feel as if I’ve begun this New Year—it sounds so good, 2011—in pretty fine style. I went to three Bikram Yoga classes and rather than despising them as I was sure I...Day Passes By
Oh, the sudden onset stomach bug. That was my later portion of Thursday evening. With that litany of words recalled when Saskia had her bout of vomiting on Monday, I thought I’d conjured all of ‘em. I neglected retch. Bingo. To make the yucky part brief...Getaway
Regardless of religious persuasion, having a birthday in spitting distance of Christmas probably means your big day is going to be overlooked. You can ask my dear husband (December 27th) about this. He will back me up. So, as ever in the holiday season—remember...The Snow, The Soupiness
If you live in the Northeast, you know that a big storm bellowed its way up the seaboard. In my town, we were promised about 15-18 inches and I think that’s about what we got. This made for one of those unequivocal snow days. The superintendent called it the...May She Know No Bounds
For some strange reason, I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be, and you can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. –Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. On MLK Day—the Federal Holiday it took decades to...Snow Day #2 During Which I Find My Inner Mouse Mama
On the second snow day within a week—the day after the three-day MLK weekend—are you expecting a reminder to register for summer camp? From here—cold, slushy then iced over with phrases like “wintry mix” and “storm next week”...Snow Day #3: Musings on Being a Work at Home Mama
A Sunday morning in New England, toward the end of January during the midwinter arctic blast that has temps barely pushing plus zero at nearly eight AM; it is beyond cold. There is enough snow piled about that driving around a corner you can connect with your inner...Friends in Foul Weather
It has just been, cold. What really is there to say about the fact that cruel and cold go together somewhere in the language for a reason? And where my general approach to winter is to embrace it enough not to be stuck inside, this round, I pretty much wanted to stay...The Snow is Pretty
The snow is pretty. Repeat that phrase. The snow is pretty. And I’m pretty much, temporarily at least, over the snow. More than the snow, I’m over feeling cold. Cold is not over New England (it’s the end of January, so that’s actually a good...Muscle Memory
Saskia’s birthday is next weekend, and I’m reminded of that parenting truism—well, child truism—that sometimes just before the birthday, it seems like the child changes, almost in front of your eyes with big developmental leaps. In...Twirling Boys
Over the past few days, I’ve read—and reread—Cheryl Kilodavis’ lovely and loving picture book My Princess Boy the way a mama to a nearly three year-old does (that’s to say—and reread and reread). The message of the book is direct...These (Snowy) Days
Seems like I can’t let the week—two snow days in a row—go by without mentioning that the white stuff seems determined—if snow has any free will whatsoever—to create a stop and start pattern to winter 2011. It’s so halting to go to...Fwee
Saskia spent some portion of her birthday learning to hold up three fingers. Two fingers held aloft, easy-peasy. The three middle fingers, though, that takes some training. In recent weeks, doubtless because we’ve been talking so very much about the whole...Snow is White
However pretty—and it is pretty—I think I’ve kind of had it with snow. Another inch or two is falling. Again, my world is lacy white and somehow just a little colder. There’s a mythic groove I could get back, if not for all this snow (and all...Wednesday's Monday Moment
Many people have particular feelings about Mondays. Songs make Monday declarations. My friend, Liz, shared hers on Facebook this week—I’m feeling overwhelmed by the week and I’m only 25 minutes into it. I could relate. I was trying to wrap my mind...The Fever
Friday was a study in bitter cold and burning hot. The morning started off with temperatures—depending what news source you picked, thermometer, dashboard, or Internet—a little or well below zero. As temperatures plunged and the wind banged against the...A Valentine to the Imperfect Morning
Valentine’s Day morning, and the teenager seems unshakeable, as in, I couldn’t wake him up for school. The little gal’s fever broke Saturday night. She continued to cling to me all day Sunday and she’s coughing and clearly not herself...Oh Right, the Thaw
I’m so not a numbers gal (ask the women I met with over a budget just last night). However, for whatever reason, the not-in-the-milestones-book marker of my reaching forty-seven-and-a-half actually made it onto my radar screen (for the record, it’s today)....Newsflash: Not All Princesses Dress in Pink
There was some stretch of months back in kindergarten when my now second grader donned a less-than-nice-to-hear tone to belittle his peers’ game—if this was even its true name—pretty, pretty princess. Let’s just say that my guy had no time for...Where I'd Like a Speak-Out
In terms of teenybopper culture, my family’s “off the grid.” No Hannah Montana around here. No Jonas Brothers. No Justin Bieber. That is, until this week. Justin Bieber in a Rolling Stone interview tried to assert himself as something other than...Style & How the Story Goes
As mama to three boys and one girl, I’m kind of accustomed to having the boys outnumber the girls (for years, it was four-to-one in my immediate family). The two bigger guys and their papa are in DC for a couple of days and so it’s me plus the smaller two...Reading, Walking, Sleeping (& the Kuh-knufflest Bunny of All)
One morning on our walk to school, Remy and I were discussing books. I said that my favorite book of all time grown-up or kids’ book had to be Charlotte’s Web. I mean it. I think it’s a pitch perfect story. He replied, “Yeah, that’s a...The Pile Up
Not to get all weather-y on you, but March has begun. In New England, March raises questions (more on that later). February had its moments. There were cold ones, snowy ones, icy ones and a few moments of crazyhopeful thaws. February had the little girl turn three...A-Ha (or Duh, Take Your Pick)
Here’s my brief little a-ha of the week (and it’s woefully obvious, so be forewarned): the juggle I’m trying somehow to manage—that whole work-laundry-parenting-exercising-community serving-sleeping-married partnering—thing? It’s...On (Re)Telling an Old Story
So, this week I published a piece on Huffington Post the gist of which is this: I had an abortion at 17 and while there were hard parts to it, the process—mostly, I’m talking about access to the procedure—was far easier than it would be if I found...On Gucamole
Living with an aspiring chef/tweenager gourmet has its perks. When he perfects something—bahn mi or refried beans, hummus, tomato sauce—we really are pretty darn golden (and delightfully full) in our household. Sometimes, his ideas don’t...E-Edition
Best Of 2024
Readers Choice 2024
