Standing In The Shadows
Glimpses Into My Younger Children's Psyches
Remy tells me, “I don’t think Barack Obama has done as much as he should. I mean he hasn’t stopped the wars and he really should.” I say, “There are so many things we wish he’d do. Compared to many Presidents, he’s done so...Four Random Observations on a Sunday Morning
Four random observations from the weekend: Grumpy children (or teenagers) can fill up space like little else. Sleep is not overrated. Sleep is not so easy to get enough of. Family is rich, complicated and holds magnetic qualities. Getting around on a bicycle is fun....On Pets
In parenting, as in much of my life, I’m pretty earnest and a hard worker. I try to do my best. There are personal limitations that are just… limiting. Brick wall thick, even. One of those for me is the whole pet issue. I just am not a...Midnight in Paris (Summer in Northampton)
This afternoon I stole away (with a friend, lovely and talented Amy—read her blog, see her first-ever trailer for her forthcoming picture book) to see Midnight in Paris. In case you were keeping track of my summer wish list, this clocked in at number 18. You...Wheels Turning
Remy took a day home from his very tiring (and-not-the-most-fun-he’s-ever-had) camp yesterday. He played with his pal, Max, for the morning. I worked. I did a little more work after I picked Saskia up from her preschool. But then, I stopped working. Remy and I...The Short Version
It’s hard for me to write the short version of things. Take yesterday. To find three good things is easy. There were plenty more than three yesterday. And with almost every good thing embedded is more to the story. Sometimes, that more to the story part adds to...Princes & Their Brothers
Here’s the shortest version of Saskia and my road trip to visit the new baby nephew: he is adorable. Of course he is. Here’s Caleb, seven weeks old. ** And his big brother, Ian, is still the prince. ** We brought the brothers a special gift: the rocking...Friends & Feminism
Although I’m not heading for some exciting vacation destination, the season keeps offering up change-of-pace delights just the same. Already this season, I’ve felt this in the strawberry field and the movie theater and this past week I’ve felt it...Heat. Shimmers.
I am wrung out. There’s a massive heat wave and the result personally is that I feel like a balloon deflated with the rubber looking darker because I’m no longer buoyant. Being wrung out is making me feel darker. Odd thing is this: there are so many...Trains, Lakes, & Sidewalks
In the day-in-the-life blogging mode, Saturday evening I chopped Lucien’s hair short so that he might feel summery cool for basketball camp this week. I didn’t bring a camera to the train, but he boarded one and rode to his grandparents’ station....Summer Rolls Through
We are tennis afternoons, talking to our brother on the phone in Philadelphia, choosing the four headbands we consider pink and purple, being bored, playing with Kate and Gabe, and hosting the soon-to-be fattest woodchuck in town in the backyard. That’s to say,...Out at Sea in the Valley
Summer is a sea of transitions. Remy leaves for camp in a couple of days. He had a transcendent time last summer. For the past few days, he’s entirely forgotten that part. Waves of tears and worry are followed by glimmers of remembering what he loved about camp....The Sky Spoke
Over the years it’s become clear to me that I love weddings. This has become especially true since I started performing wedding ceremonies. When you are meeting couples for the express purpose of officiating their weddings, you are offered glimpses into love at...Off to Camp
Remy, dear Remy, had a hard time psyching himself up to go back to Journey’s End Farm Camp. Make no mistake: his first two-week stint there last summer was fantastic. I think I said till I was rather blue in the face that sometimes even a thing you love is hard...Naps & Such
Every once in a while this summer, my mind returns to my wish list and I wonder whether I’m checking anything new off of it. I’m in the middle of making jam with my friend, Marci. I am ridiculously excited by this whole learning to make jam event. Just...Fully Friday
It’s Friday of what’s been a packed workweek. I have been pushing, pushing on some deadlines. Of course, the two most elusive stories aren’t nearly done. Yet, I’ve cleared through a bunch else and even those are starting to have handholds. Some...Letter From Camp
Having Remy off at overnight camp has been easier this year, for me. I knew that for all his anxiety about leaving once he got there he would be enveloped in the fun of camp. And to an extent, that was that. This year I didn’t have a knot in my stomach once I...Clickberry, Clackberry
Quoting my dear husband: “Given the fact that my wife loved Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books so much, her wanting to learn to make jam was practically inevitable.” There may be an iota of truth to this. To be perfectly clear I am not a sewer or knitter...Gold, Silver, Near, Far, Friends
I’m definitely having a wee bit of summer melancholy. It’s the August-is-here-summer-is-fleeting variety. I don’t feel recharged yet. I thought of summer as recharge time. It’s more like four-kids-many-transitions-bunches-of-work busyness this...Do Something
The swirl the world made this week, from riots to Wall Street’s mood swings, almost has me wanting to resign from civic engagement. At the very same time, I was reminded that the best thing to do when the overall mania of the world, capital W, feels overwhelming...Camp Pickup
Few hugs are as fantastic as the one you get from your beaming, tired, sunned, extremely filthy camper when you arrive at camp. How fitting that his camp is called Journey’s End Farm Camp. As he introduced us to the animals, it was clear that what happens at...The Pie's the Thing
I have a mother-in-law whose abilities to make PIE are pretty much, legendary. She made a birthday pie for a friend the other evening. Quoting Rachel: “Lisa, can you alert me the next time you make pie and then include me in eating it?” My friend Gina...Birthday (Mine)
The little girl and me, we’re hanging. Sunnyside is on vacation. The papa and the boys are on vacation. I really dislike the word staycation. Besides, I defy you to tell me a long chunk of every bedtime and every wakeup and most meltdowns in between is exactly...Friday in the Quieter Household
On the fourth day, good things abounded: Not one but two yoga classes Holding the sweetest five-month-old for a good chunk of time (nice mama let me) Zestar apple Chats with friends Selling some books and pouring that money into cleaning the house more so the dust...Slow Mode
Last night, I was trying to think about what to write on my blog beyond the very nothing-ness that seems to be our quiet little mama plus three-and-a-half year-old gal time. It’s really been stuff like a swim club trip with friends, a morning hanging with an...A Deux
Beyond the cutest of walks between home and town—okay, you could insert Herrell’s for town on more than one occasion—and this week’s trip to a truly empty Holyoke Canoe Club, where we did not share the pool with anyone else for an hour, I guess...Under Irene's Spell
Sunday morning and it’s… raining and pouring. The air holds the tropical well, so everything feels soft and damp and oddly tender. Saskia wonders at eight in the morning when the rain will stop. I think the air calls for palm trees, maybe some sand...Sunshine & Bright Returns
There’s this line in Maurice Sendak and Arthur Yorinks’ The Miami Giant about a boat landing in Miami that goes, “So I swerved a bit.” That line of that very odd book, which manages to be funny and just a smidge unsettling at once, came to me...Pretty Smart Girls
When confronted with this image, what do you say? No comment. ** I think the JC Penney shirt is such an extreme example it went viral. The uproar was so great they pulled the shirt and apologized. Okay, but do I offer my three year-old-daughter a choice about what to...Tumbling from Summer
Turns and bedtime do not go hand-in-hand. Both Saskia and Arella wanted to be first going up the stairs to hear Saskia’s bedtime stories. They sat miserably just below the landing. I tried turns. No dice. “Would you each like a cookie?” I asked....The Business Surrounding Babies
I stayed up way too late last night reading two articles, one about the debate over whether reducing multiple pregnancies (twins or above) down to singleton pregnancies, the other about a sperm donor with 150 children. The shared theme between these articles seems to...It All Leads to Jamming
A couple of reasons I know that my jamming has overtaken some prime emotional real estate: 1) I was ready to try a new method—with pectin, well Pomona, the local pectin—of jam making, 2) on someone’s status update about jamming, I commented...Bluest Skies
How could a day with such blue skies be so horrifying? Ten years, two wars, and here two more children later, I still believe in peace and I still believe peace is not the opposite of war; peace is about learning to nurture compassion. It’s about helping one...A Couple of Equations
Yet another degrading to women shirt has appeared on the market. This one is about how girls can’t do math. I struggled with math my entire schooling life. In fact, the recurring dream I had before finishing my B.A. and my MFA was that I had to return to my high...And Then There Was Pie
After a couple of days when the rollercoaster aspect of parenting—think stomach-turning freefall sensation and loads of screaming in a loop—was seemingly more prevalent than anything else, we were oddly lulled by an afternoon of people and pie. Or maybe,...September is Like This
As the week wended its way to a close, I started to think about bumps on the road. Maybe having a few deadlines piled up got me thinking about this. The freelance writer gig has so many ups and downs and general insecurity. Meaning, deadlines are good. And meaning,...Teen Blur, Birthday
The eldest boy turns 16 today. Just, wow. This morning I drove him to school because he had a calculus test first thing. First thing at our school is 7:30 in the morning, which is like a lot of hours too early for calculus—or school. But there you have it....The Peach Cure
Briefly, between some struggles in teen-dom and a three-year-old unable to fall asleep or tolerate staying in her room alone there’s a wee bit of overload going on around here. Add to that work, allergies and the September adjustment factor and yeah, overload....Rainy Evening Moment
Here’s a moment in time: I’m listening to the rain; that’s because it’s so loud I cannot not listen. I know that sentence is grammatically incorrect. I have the overhead light on because it’s so dark outside and somehow this is making the...Welcome To My World
This week my eldest turned 16. How did that happen? How did that little babe with the giant eyes and owlish eyebrows from birth become tall and loud and crazy smart and funny and insecure and self-confident and more all at once? How did I go from being in my early...Living in Threes
It seems every person has a few rules to live by, not of the golden rule variety but of the this-works-for-me ilk. Over the years, I’ve become a devotee to the three good things school of thought; that is, not so much about the number three than the belief that...They Don't Show This on TV
I’m totally teen years—the biggest boy turned 16 this month—into parenting. The third guy just turned nine (!). Raising a family and being married is, on the one hand, everything I hoped it would be and completely different from what I imagined....Wedding Anniversary
When I think back on this morning eighteen years ago, it really does seem a lifetime ago. Just a couple of weeks shy of three years in (relationship, love, living together—all more or less an instant deal) we were not strangers or anything. Still, our sense of...Sleep Update (cough)
Last weekend, I whacked my tailbone. It was one of those annoying maternal injuries. I reached for a squirming three-year-old across the table—at Herrell’s of course—and the force knocked me back harder than expected against the banquette. I did not...My New Mottos
Last month, I was catching up with my cousin. She called on a morning when the aspiring chef teen woke at five in order to assemble and bake an apple pie for a pie contest. In my slumber, I said to him sure, bake the younger guy’s peach pie as well. That’s...Middling Momming Or Muddling Momming
In the land of the blogosphere where you can pretty much convince yourself that every other mother is sewing her house’s curtains, cooking straight from the bountiful, beautiful garden and managing to do BIG IMPORTANT THINGS away from home, all whilst rocking a...New England & the New Year
No question that living in New England, the timing of the New Year works: all that sweet harvest energy, the juicy apples, the mysterious grape scent wafting, even the crunch of the leaves that make your footsteps talk back. The light, the foliage and the endings of...The Moment You Stop
Post solo-parenting last week when three boys had the tummy bug and one energetic preschool girl didn’t, I am pretty kazausted, to quote one of my kids way-back-when. I’m just taking this moment to note we are often seem to take modern life like interval...An Autumn Wish List
Because I walk my kids to the R42 bus each morning, I am definitely clear that autumn has actually arrived, if sometimes in soggier than usual form. The trees are working their jewel-toned magic, if a bit more slowly than usual. With her class, Saskia’s been...Auntie
Ant, aunt; po-tate-toe, po-ta-toe. ** Yesterday, taking advantage of the rain, his month of parental leave, and his father’s visit from the West Coast, my brother-in-law zipped out with carseat, diapers, bottles, change of clothing, family vehicle and infant in...On I Love My Body
Yesterday in the slipstream of what runs down my Twitter stream like so much I have idea what, so many words and thoughts and witticisms, was this: yesterday NOW was calling a day in the blogosphere to love our bodies. I think I’m a day late, possibly a dollar...Food Beyond the Table
For parents, there are all stages of food from nursing or bottle feeding stories to the introduction of solid food to the interesting process of helping another person eat, attempt, enjoy, not throw, and appreciate food. I still remember speaking with one frustrated...Dinner Can Lead to…
Twenty-one years ago tomorrow, a certain dear husband and I went out on our very first date. Spoleto restaurant was where Pizzeria Paradiso is now and we sat up in the cozy rafter space that’s now the brick oven. I am so not messing with that as metaphor....The PR Call
You know how sometimes a friend or family member calls and delivers such a perky everything’s perfect call that you can almost feel the gloss on their tongues? A friend was over yesterday describing such a call from a friend of hers as “the PR call.”...Before Halloween
This week started off super productively. I was just… cruising (well, actually, I was getting a lot of writing done). It was write-write-write and everything else. I finished some stuff. I sent some stuff out. Optimism and accomplishment reigned. I even...Equations Puzzled Over Snotober 2011
Here’s some math: 48 hours without power=a household grateful for heat, light, working refrigeration, and Internet. ** I probably flashed to the mind-numbing routine that was essentially waiting out storms in Laura Ingalls Wilder’s The Long Winter about...Power Outage Reading: In Spite of Everything
The one thing I did right during the whole Snotober experience was that on Sunday, when we were without power and with a warm enough, cozy, friend-and-family filled downstairs—picture adults, teens, and kids playing games—I went back to bed. I had my...Emotional Fallout
At the end of this upended week when not everyone I know has power back, I guess it’s not surprising that I feel somewhat discombobulated. I do. I had exactly one day of the preschooler’s preschool this week. There’s probably some direct algebraic...For National Adoption Month: The Language of Flowers
In the very early months of Saskia’s life, it seemed as if during every visit we made together to Whole Foods—tiny little babe bundled in the fleecy sling or Moby—I met fellow adoptive parents. In fact, one friend was in the midst of an adoption...E-Edition
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